Insomnia:

My eyes have grown tired.
But my mind is wide awake.
It is starting again.
I remember how it started.
Four hours is all you actuality "need".
So you start thinking numbers,
but then you see that is where it starts,
my mind runs wild,
sleep 5am, up noon, sleep 8am, up noon, sleep 2:45 am, up 6:45...
counting,
calculating,
thinking,
repeating
double checking,
triple checking.
Then trailing off from there,
to something else,
to something else,
until well here I'm am,
Typing, typing, typing, typing, typing, typing, typing, typing, typing, typing, typing.


This could be a good thing.
Yet if I keep this up,
I'll soon be falling into that half awake half asleep state.
Where nothing makes sense, but every things fits perfectly together.
The things you think about, you often forget you are saying them aloud.
But after a couple days, or even hours,
you just stop caring, things blend together, time becomes numbers.

I miss the moon, the night.
I miss the silence, and the echos from the alleys.
I miss sitting and staring at the ocean,
late at night on the pier.
Sitting with my best friend.
We wouldn't talk, only a few words every now and then.
Endless cigarettes.
I'd empty my mind.
Give it to the sea.
Focus on a wave and let it set me free.

I need that again.